[ this question is, ironically enough, one Abel asked from the other side of the fence too many times to count himself. it's a little surreal to be on this end of the discussion now - but things have changed, time has passed, and even if he knows better than to suggest he has the answers... because he doesn't, he also knows neither does Paul.
no one does. not a single man on God's green Earth or any world of His creation-- or beyond it. that, Abel believes.
because there is no answer. there is no good answer to this question. ]
If you were to ask me... ask me personally, my answer might not be a satisfying one.
[ it leaves him quietly. Paul has seen what it is for others to suffer in unconscionable ways, and the gravity of that is one Abel can deeply respect and empathize with. this compassion...
is endearing. and heartbreaking. and, sometimes-- blinding. ]
...Because there is no pain I find acceptable, no price I could put on saving someone - even one someone - from that agony.
But I also know that I... I am not capable of passing judgment on how to balance the scales. And I hope you take no offense when I say this, but... I don't believe you are capable either. None of us are-- we can't be.
[ it is no failing of Paul's person. if anything, Abel thinks this man is one he'd quite like, actually - someone whose heart is achingly good at its core, who suffers to see others suffer, who bleeds for the sake of staunching the flow of blood from those around him, but...
this... this is too far. this is too much. they are not gods; they are men - and to summarily pass judgment, to decide the fate of infinite lives, to hinge everything on a mysterious being that has manipulated and abused each one of them to their last--
...Paul. ...please. does any part of him see the flaw in this? does any part of that achingly human heart not feel the twinge of fear he spoke of? ]
no subject
[ this question is, ironically enough, one Abel asked from the other side of the fence too many times to count himself. it's a little surreal to be on this end of the discussion now - but things have changed, time has passed, and even if he knows better than to suggest he has the answers... because he doesn't, he also knows neither does Paul.
no one does. not a single man on God's green Earth or any world of His creation-- or beyond it. that, Abel believes.
because there is no answer. there is no good answer to this question. ]
If you were to ask me... ask me personally, my answer might not be a satisfying one.
[ it leaves him quietly. Paul has seen what it is for others to suffer in unconscionable ways, and the gravity of that is one Abel can deeply respect and empathize with. this compassion...
is endearing. and heartbreaking. and, sometimes-- blinding. ]
...Because there is no pain I find acceptable, no price I could put on saving someone - even one someone - from that agony.
But I also know that I... I am not capable of passing judgment on how to balance the scales. And I hope you take no offense when I say this, but... I don't believe you are capable either. None of us are-- we can't be.
[ it is no failing of Paul's person. if anything, Abel thinks this man is one he'd quite like, actually - someone whose heart is achingly good at its core, who suffers to see others suffer, who bleeds for the sake of staunching the flow of blood from those around him, but...
this... this is too far. this is too much. they are not gods; they are men - and to summarily pass judgment, to decide the fate of infinite lives, to hinge everything on a mysterious being that has manipulated and abused each one of them to their last--
...Paul. ...please. does any part of him see the flaw in this? does any part of that achingly human heart not feel the twinge of fear he spoke of? ]